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  Women’s Anatomy of Arousal

     Whether you’re a man or a woman, the information on this page can help you have great sex.

     It comes from the Hindu Tantra tradition. The Love Song of Shakti and Shiva, In the beginning, was the One. The One was all and everything, and for eons, it reveled in being One for millennia of magnificent unitary bliss. Over the course of unimaginable time, however, the One grew bored. (Even the Divine gets bored with itself eventually.) So the One split into two. One part was Shakti—she of energy, flow, and movement. The other was Shiva—he of consciousness, presence, and purpose. As soon as the one became two, they gazed upon each other, fell madly in love, and wanted nothing more than to re-unite. They clasped each other passionately and explored all the ways two could merge into one. In that moment, the entire universe was born. All life sprang into being and is springing still. It was the original big bang! The story of Shakti and Shiva is an origin story about the universe, and a story about each and every one of us. Like them, we long for connection, are magnetized by attraction, and drawn by the desire to merge into oneness. Like them, passion is what connects us to all life, and desire is our path to divine union. Sex—The Essential Life Force The saga of Shakti and Shiva reminds us that ecstasy is our birthright and the source of all existence.

     There is much more to women’s pleasure than the clitoris, and there’s more to the clitoris than meets the eye. This ultra-sensitive sweet button is only the tip of the female volcano, just one component of a whole network of erogenous structures. Women have an interlocking set of sexual pleasure parts, most of which are unknown or misunderstood. women’s sexual arousal is first and foremost for her full sexual arousal network to kick in she needs to feel safe. Her arousal starts in the parasympathetic nervous system the nervous system that is operating when we are at rest. It is not until our bodies feel deep trust that the arousal can start to happen, and then we move in the sympathetic as arousal starts to kick in and excitement builds. Too many times we may try to kick start our arousal system when there is not a feeling of deep trust and safety, maybe we feel rushed that we are taking too long, that he is more aroused, all of these things can hinder our arousal, and ultimately our deep pleasure.

     The other thing is that there is so much more to the pleasure centers of the yoni than the clitoris, sure that is an incredibly sensitive and pleasurable spot on a woman yoni but the tip of the clitoris is just a tiny part of her full arousal system. When the whole system is engaged sexual arousal feels way different, penetration feels much more pleasurable, orgasms are deeper and more fulfilling and sex takes on a whole deeper level. It is when we are in these really heightened states of arousal that we can have more mystical experiences of sexual union, with ourselves, with the cosmos as well as with the beloved in front of us.

     So for all the women out there, do you know what gives you pleasure? do you know what you really desire? have you ever sat with that question with a partner?  sex is more than our individual desires, erotic experiences, intimate connections, and sexual behavior. It is the deepest expression of the power of creation.

If you want to have better sex and more satisfying intimate relationships, the place to begin is with yourself—and, more specifically, with your relationship to your own sexuality.  The more you understand who you are sexually and how you operate, the better you’ll do in all aspects of your life, sex included.

     Once we really get to know our desires and our anatomy, then we have a much better chance of having the types of sexual experiences we really crave, and then if we are having the kinds of sexual experiences that
deeply fulfills us, and aren’t about meeting another need then surely then we are going to be more interested in actually engaging sexually.  If you believe your sexual status quo is all that’s possible, then that’s all you’ll ever have. But if you believe that you can develop erotic mastery, then that’s what you’ll achieve, so long as your faith is accompanied by commitment and skilled guidance. We’re all on a lifelong learning journey. By making sex a conscious part of it, you can make your whole life better—filled with more pleasure, power, and connection.

     Taking responsibility for our desires, for our pleasure is really important for our well-being as women. Without pleasure in our lives, we become dull,  listless, we find other things to try to compensate, we are more moody, sexual pleasure is a really important part of well-being. When a woman is fulfilled sexually she is more
radiant, more loving, has many more of the feel-good hormones running through her system, but it needs to be deeply fulfilling heart-opening sexuality, not just a quick fix, that will deplete us eventually.


     We’re especially challenged in our understanding of women, including both the specifics of female anatomy and more immaterial concepts such as feminine energy and power. Realistic, helpful models of female sexuality are not easy to come by.Many of the structures responsible for arousal and orgasm are absent from our models or woefully misunderstood, forcing women and their lovers to look for that legendary mega-orgasmic place without a good map to guide them.

     Contemporary sex education should include vital and cutting- edge information about the female erectile network, as many people are unaware that pound for pound, women have as much erectile tissue as men.

No longer are women limited to only two parts—the head, or glans, of the clitoris, and the G-spot—as the main sources of their sexual arousal and pleasure. The female erectile tissue (aka pleasure) network includes the entire clitoral structure, which is by far larger than what most people have been taught. This includes the clitoral head, shaft, and legs (crura), the erectile bulbs (vestibular) and two sponges: urethral and perineal. The associated orifices are the vaginal and anal openings.

     Arousal is the state with specific feelings and physiologic changes usually associated with sexual activity involving the genitals. Arousal may be said to consist of: 1) central mechanisms including activation of thoughts, dreams, and fantasies, 2) non-genital peripheral mechanisms such as salivation, sweating, cutaneous vasodilation, and nipple erection and 3) genital mechanisms such as clitoral, labial and vaginal engorgement. Orgasm is the altered state of consciousness associated with primarily genital sensory input. Orgasm consists of multiple sensory afferent information from trigger points such as the clitoris, labia, vagina, periurethral glands, etc., which pass centrally to supraspinal structures likely involving the thalamic septum. Following sufficient sensory stimulation, central neurotransmitter discharge during orgasm results in repeated 1-second motor contractions of the pelvic floor (3 – 8/orgasm) followed in 2 – 4 seconds by repeated uterine and vaginal smooth muscle contraction. Pleasurable sensory information is also carried to the cortical pleasure sites.

     It turns out that the entire clitoris is a wishbone-shaped structure about 3 ½ inches in length and 2 ½ inches in width. The glans of the clitoris is the visible tip that protrudes at the top of the female genitalia. But the clitoris extends into the body and then splits downward into two legs like parts, the crura, which are composed of erectile tissue and are adjacent to the vagina and urethra. “The vaginal wall is, in fact, the clitoris. If you lift the skin off the vagina on the sidewalls, you get the bulbs of the clitoris - triangular, crescent masses of erectile tissue."So perhaps a different part of the clitoris gets more stimulated during sexual intercourse than in masturbation, but the pleasure is still clitoral.

. You just can't have too much lubricant. That's right—for many women adding a lubricant to lovemaking can make sex go from uncomfortable to ecstatic. Want to make things even better? Combine the lubricant with some female topical arousal gel-like Wellgenix Orgazyme Topical Stimulation Gel this can be about adding pleasure to women who lubricate quite normally. Lubricants can enhance female pleasure.

     Women can suffer from sexual boredom just like men. I know this is a hard one to believe. After all according to way too many experts on relationships and female sexuality if a woman is feeling emotionally connected and loved she is turned on forever and ever! It is the men—those beasts— who need sexual variety! Hold on to your it comes—this is simply not true for all women!

     Many women's sexual experiences could be remarkably improved by learning how to receive pleasure as opposed to developing skills on how to give pleasure.

     What if the sexual partner told their female lover that tonight was just all about them? Have you ever tried that? What if the partner told their female lover that you did not want her to touch back—that your pleasure was simply to give her pleasure. You might meet with resistance, both your own—if you are a woman reading this article, or as the partner who may be told that she doesn't want to do that. That her pleasure is YOUR pleasure. Push on and insist!

     We have created a culture of women "doers" as opposed to giving permission for women to simply receive. It is an unimaginable pleasure and concept for many women to simply lay back and receive pleasure. So the last secret about female sexuality is also a sex tip—try it. See what happens...It takes a great man to hold the space for a woman’s deep pleasure too, he has to let go of his need to release and be free of goal orientation.

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