Orgasmic dysfunction is when a woman either cannot reach orgasm or has trouble reaching orgasm when she is sexually excited. Orgasmic disorders among women are particularly intriguing because female orgasm is so variable. Some women are promptly and reliably orgasmic with a minimum of stimulation, while other women require concentrated stimulation in a particular fashion for extended periods of time for orgasmic release to be triggered. The psychological and cultural valuation and 'meaning' of orgasm are complex as well and have changed considerably over the past 50 years.
When sex is not enjoyable, it can become a chore instead of a satisfying, intimate experience for both partners. Sexual desire may decline, and sex may occur less often. This can create resentment and conflict in the relationship.
Women who have problems with orgasms and who feel significant distress about those problems may be diagnosed with anorgasmia.
Anorgasmia is diagnosed in women as Female Orgasmic Disorder (FOD). 10-15% of women have never experienced an orgasmic release. About 10% to 15% of women have never had an orgasm. Surveys suggest that up to one half of women are not satisfied with how often they reach orgasm. Sexual response involves the mind and body working together in a complex way. Both need to function well for an orgasm to happen. Other women may have experienced a frustrating shift in the frequency or quality of their orgasms.
Multiple factors may lead to anorgasmia. These include relationship or intimacy issues, cultural factors, physical or medical conditions, and medications. Treatments can include education about sexual stimulation, sexual enhancement devices, individual or couple therapy, and medications.
Primary: Women have never been able to have an orgasm.
Secondary: Women were previously able to have an orgasm but are now no longer able to do so.
Generalized: Experiencing difficulties with orgasm regardless of the type of stimulation, situation, or partner
Situational: Experiencing difficulties with orgasm only with certain types of stimulation, situations, or partners
Factors that contribute to female orgasmic disorder include
Contextual factors (consistently insufficient foreplay, early ejaculation by the partner, poor communication about sexual preferences)
Psychological factors (anxiety, stress, lack of trust in a partner)
Cultural factors (lack of recognition of or attention paid to female sexual pleasure)
Drug therapy (me anti-psychotics or, commonly, selective serotonin re-uptake inhibitors [SSRIs])
A history of sexual abuse
Lack of knowledge about sexual function
Negative feelings about sex (often learned in childhood or teen years)
Shyness or embarrassment about asking for the type of touching off that works best
Damage to genital sensory or autonomic nerves or pathways (due to diabetes or multiple sclerosis)
Gynecological treatments. Tissue damage from gynecologic surgeries, such as cancer surgery, may affect the ability to have an orgasm.
Vulval dystrophy (lichen sclerosus)
Hormonal disorders or changes, such as menopause.
Chronic illnesses that affect health and sexual interest.
Chronic pelvic pain, such as from endometriosis, Vaginismus spasm of the muscles surrounding the vagina that occurs against your will. Vaginal dryness
Problems with your sex partner may be contributing factors to problems with orgasms. These may include:
* Lack of emotional intimacy
* Unresolved conflicts
* Poor communication of sexual needs and preferences
* Infidelity or breach of trust
* Intimate partner violence
* Partner's sexual dysfunction, such a male partner with erectile dysfunction, Premature Ejaculation
Female sexual dysfunction is a general term comprising several sexual health concerns that can be distressing for patients, including female sexual interest/arousal disorder, female orgasmic disorder, and Genito-pelvic pain/penetration disorder. These sexual health concerns are not considered dysfunctions unless they cause distress.
Important goals when treating problems with orgasms are:
* A healthy attitude toward sex, and education about sexual stimulation and response
* Learning to clearly communicate sexual needs and desires, verbally or non-verbally
* Self stimulation
* Psychological therapies
* Sex therapy for women, with or without their partners, can often help them with concerns about sexual performance and feelings.
* Do Kegel exercises. Tighten and relax the pelvic muscles.
* Focus on other sexual activities, not just intercourse.
Treatment can involve education and learning to reach orgasm by focusing on pleasurable stimulation and directed masturbation.
* Most women require clitoral stimulation to reach an orgasm. Including clitoral stimulation in sexual activity may be all that is necessary.
* If this does not solve the problem, then teaching the woman to masturbate may help her understand what she needs to become sexually excited.
* Use of a mechanical device, such as a vibrator, may be helpful to achieve orgasm with masturbation.
Treatment may include sexual counseling to learn series of couple’s exercises to:
* Learn and practice communication
* Learn more effective stimulation and playfulness
* Education around sexual techniques and types of stimulation.
* Coaching for you and/or your partner on exercises to enhance pleasure such as Tantric techniques
* Fostering improved communication skills around sex.
* Techniques for reducing stress that may be impeding your enjoyment of sex.
* Helping you to explore and diffuse trauma history, sexual shame, or negative self-talk.
* Addressing any underlying psychological factors contributing to anorgasmia, such as depression or anxiety.
Related sexual disorders
Women experiencing anorgasmia may have one or more related sexual problems. These may contribute to or complicate the problem with having orgasms. These conditions include:
* Problems with sexual arousal
* Little or no desire for sex
* Pain from sexual intercourse or other sexual stimulation
* Dryness of the vagina or vulva
* Involuntary tightening of the vagina (vaginismus)
Tantric therapy has been shown to be very effective in the treatment of female anorgasmia. The approach that the tantric therapist usually takes in these cases usually begins with the de-genitalization of orgasm. It is possible to feel it with stimuli throughout the body. In the treatment of anorgasmia, this expansion of sensitivity can be liberating and only the beginning of this process already presents a series of reports of healing. The main result is the discovery and recognition of the body itself. Find the triggers, the levers that drive your own pleasure.
Tantra for women works on the causes of female anorgasmia, but it goes beyond sexuality, it is a personal liberation that encompasses your whole being.
Orgasms are not the ultimate goal in Tantra, rather the orgasm is seen as the starting point. With proper sadhana (Tantric practice), a woman who does not have orgasms can get to know her body and her mind much more intimately. So, she progressively frees herself of the mental programming that was preventing her from having orgasms and becomes multi-orgasmic.